What Is Self-Care? * Spotlight My Health

What is self-care? Why do we need it? Both are good questions. Self-care can help you feel better all around. Need a pick-me-up? Or some pampering? Maybe you just want to relax or get rid of some tension. Any of these needs would be a good reason to indulge in some self-care. And the benefits are even greater when self-care is a regular practice.

And psssttt—self-care doesn’t just mean going to get your nails or hair done, or shopping. If you really enjoy these things, then they would only be a small part of your self-care.

When we practice self-care on a regular basis, we are actually helping to keep a natural balance between our mind, body and emotions. Self-care is recognizing and taking care of your core beliefs and needs.

To me these core needs have to do with these basic areas: Spiritual, intellectual, emotional, physical, mental, environment, social and financial. Bottom line for self-care, it’s necessary for your survival and happiness.

Start with Your Basic Beliefs and Needs

If you don’t know what your basic beliefs and needs are, then that is where you want to start. For example, for me to have peace of mind, there are some things I need, to ensure my peace. Those things are money; I need to know that I’ve got a budget and that I’m working within that budget. This is huge for my peace of mind.

You may not have thought of this as self-care, but it is. If I’m always worried about my money, that’s not very good self-care for me.

A couple of other things, I know I need, are books and some quite time for myself. I’ve always been a big reader, so needless to say, I have hundreds of books on my kindle so I can read anytime and anywhere I am.

This is how I put my world aside for a bit and enter a new one that is usually totally different from mine. Keeps my mind going and helps me relax for a half-hour.

Taking care of intellectual self-care by putting together a puzzle on ipad

If I can do this away from everyone, then that kills two birds with one stone. I get to stimulate my brain with the reading while also having my quite time. This should give you some idea of what I’m talking about when I say self-care.

You may not have thought about it this way before, but it is really that simple. We need to help those parts of ourselves, that with a little attention, makes taking care of others easier because we are in a better place ourselves.

There are different areas of self-care that are part of the equation that help you feel more balanced. So, let’s take a look at them.

ONE: SOCIAL

Clean up your social circle of anyone or anything that brings you down or makes you feel bad about yourself. You don’t need it.

About two years ago, I stopped listening and watching the news all the time. It would stress me out, big time. But, I felt much better after a few weeks of withdrawal symptoms. And I won’t be going backwards with this.

You have to do the same with any social media or friends and yes, even family that cause you grief. Social detox is the name of the game. I don’t believe that everyone is meant to be in our lives forever. There are friends that come into your life, stay a while and then they are gone. And that’s OK.

Other people you will meet and know they will be around forever and that’s definitely OK; especially if they are someone that puts a smile in your heart.

It’s harder to do that with family members, but if there is someone that upsets you, try to cut back on your contact with them. And we all have someone like that in our families. So, at a family gathering, hang out in another group, if possible.

Be picky with the people you choose to spend time with. That’s one thing I’ve noticed that comes with age. I no longer feel like I need everyone to like me. I truly pick and choose who I spend time with. It’s much better on my psyche and puts that smile in my heart. These relationships should make you feel good and raise you up or generally help you feel good. We need the good memories and a support system that you can count on.

Helpful Activities

**Detox from anything that brings you down; friends, facebook, Instagram, the news, etc.

**Spend time with friends or family that raise your vibration (good feelings and spirit)

**Play with or spend time with your kids; or alone time with your partner

Pin to your board on women!

TWO: SPIRITUAL

Spiritual self-care is about getting down to the nitty-gritty with your most-higher self and the Divine. This can be done many ways, such as: meditation, gratitude, yoga and prayer.

This is the time to get in touch with yourself. Your values, beliefs and who you are. Find your purpose in life or a purpose. Turn to your God, higher self, the Divine, Source, Allah, etc.

Helpful Activities

**Meditate

**Practice Yoga

**Spend time outdoors in nature, run your feet through the grass

**Relax to some music

THREE: SENSORY

Again, this has to do with making yourself feel good through all five of your senses: sight, touch, smell, taste and hearing.

I like materials that feel soft, but I also like running my feet through the sand at the beach.

My eye is drawn to certain colors, so those are what I use to decorate, through accessories like pillows, wall color or curtains.

Candles help my home smell good or baking when the mood strikes and then my family has something good to eat! Putting on some good music and and let go and jam helps with other senses and generally makes you feel downright happy with yourself!

The point is to hit all your senses with warm, fuzzy feelings to where you walk away smiling.

Helpful Activities

**Take a nice, long bubble bath, light some candles, drink some wine

**Get softer bedding

**Get rid of all the clothes that bother you, for whatever reason. Think about it—when you have a bra that bothers the bejesus out of you, how does that make you feel all day. Or a pair of shoes that are killing your feet. I know you been there, cause I have!

FOUR: PHYSICAL

This includes more than just exercise and healthy eating. It also includes getting enough sleep or even taking a nap if you feel like you really need one. (and no guilt)

Take care of your appearance by getting those nails and hair done if you like to do that sort of thing. A massage or Reiki session, a nice long soak in the tub, would help not only with you physically, but several of your other senses also.

Helpful Activities

**Exercise, even if for only 10 minutes

**Eat more healthy

**Drink water

**See appropriate doctors or counselors when needed

FIVE: EMOTIONAL

We have to learn how deal with stress and handle tough emotions that we might rather ignore. These two things alone can greatly affect our emotional health. Seek a counselor if you need to, sign up for a support group if this is needed. Life can be rough, at times—learn how not to blame everyone else and how to get through things.

Put your big girl panties on and stop ignoring feelings that cause you to do things that aren’t good for you. And getting help and learning to deal, will also turn around how you feel about yourself

For some reason, a lot of us tend to ignore our feelings even though we know it isn’t good.

We need to come to terms with how we feel about ourselves and just let yourself “be”. I find it very hard to believe the good Lord wants us to feel so badly about ourselves, after all, he made us and he doesn’t make mistakes.

So, if you want to sing, then sing; if you want to cry, then cry and if you want to laugh—definitely laugh. The point is not to wallow in the bad parts. Work through them and move on. You’ll feel much better.

This is how you take care of your emotional needs—by acknowledging them and accepting them , you enable yourself to move forward.

Now I’m not saying to shout out at the top of your lungs when you are angry or cry at the drop of a hat, but to pay attention to what you feel.

Listen to your feelings and intuition—they both come from within you and are not wrong. When you take the time to nurture your needs for your mind, body and soul, you will feel better. You will be you.

Helpful Activities

**Be mindful of negative self-talk and turn it off

**Use your support system with needed and this can be professional if needed or what you prefer

**Figure out your trigger points and make a plan to get around them

SIX: MENTAL

If you look up “mental health/wellness” in google, several sites come up to tell you what this is, but the World Health Organization says “a state of well-being in which the individual realizes their own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to his or her community.” https://advantagecaredtc.org/mental-wellness/

Basically, this means our mental health affects how we think, feel and act. Taking care of your mental health is managing your stress levels, your self-talk and your thoughts. See my post on liking yourself to address your thinking and self-talk. Positive affirmations, intentions, practicing mindfulness and meditating can help with this element of your self-care.

Helpful Activities

**Be mindful of your thoughts

**Stop the negative self-talk

**Use positive affirmations

**Get your home and financial accounts in order

SEVEN: INTELLECTUAL

Our minds are no different than the rest of our body. It needs to be used and stimulated to stay on top. And since your brain is the leader of the pack, so to speak, it needs to be in tip top shape to keep everything else in good running order.

Helpful Activities

** Reading a book, being creative, doing a puzzle or learning a new language are all good exercises for your brain.

EIGHT: ENVIRONMENTAL

This is a biggie for me as I’m very affected by my environment. So, I put things around me that make a difference. I like our home to be light and airy and feel expansive. I want people that come into our home to feel comfortable, so that is how we decorate. And we use colors that are calming and add to the comfy, friendly look that we are going for.

I also have to make sure my home or space (at work) doesn’t get too cluttered. When this happens, it makes me feel confused too—like I don’t know where to start because there is sooo much.

While our kids were growing up, we let them choose the color of paint for their bedrooms and most of the decorations, within reason. The only colors off limits for the wall was red, black and brown. This gave each of them a space that fit them. It’s a good idea to do this for yourself too.

Get your environment in order and set-up to help you and your family feel good. It should be a place you want to be in and look forward to coming home to.

Helpful Activities

**Clean up the clutter

**Put things around you that make you feel good

**Protect your environment by doing things like: batteries in alarms, plants that clean the air around them

**Use non-toxic cleaning products

CONCLUSION

These are the main parts to self-care. Now let’s take a look at some benefits to this practicing self-care.

*Helps you re-focus on yourself

*Brings about self-awareness

*Can help bring down anxiety

*Keeps you more in the moment

*Increases your happiness

*Could help prevent stress related illness

*Helps decrease stress

*Feeling better helps increase self-esteem

Self-care is a big important part of our lives and once we get into the habit of practicing what makes us feel good about ourselves and help ourselves reach the top of the hill, we realize we are finally in control—Yeah, baby!