Legal Documents For Graduates * Spotlight My Health

LEGAL DOCS NEEDED

Did you know that there legal documents for graduates that are needed? Do you know what they are? Most of us, as parents, don’t really think about the day our children become old enough to do things on their own. We started letting our kids do a bit more once they hit 16 or so. You know the dreaded age they can start driving. Yeah, we hated it too, especially since the first to drive was our daughter–the impulsive one. Oh Lordy, the worry.

But we soon learned there were advantages to her driving. She could drive herself and her younger brother the places they had to go. This basically left us out of the carpool equation that we had been in for quite a while. Wooohoooo, did that feel freeing or what.

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LIFE CHANGING MOMENTS

A few short years later the feeling of freedom disappeared in a matter of minutes, if not seconds. December 23, 2006 about 11:00 p.m. our phone rang. I was the lucky one to answer and heard “Is this Chivon’s Mom?” “Yes, why?” “Because her and Margo were just taken by medevac to the hospital.” “They had a car accident”. After that, all I wanted to know was which hospital.

Now that night turned into a rather long, drawn out story. Suffice it to say, my baby girl survived that awful night, but received a serious traumatic brain injury, so she can no longer take care of herself. Oh, and she wasn’t driving, but was the passenger. The only other injury she had was a broken arm.

During her long stay in the hospital, we learned a few, very hard truths. Because she was 19, we couldn’t take pictures of her–she couldn’t give her permission. Go figure, we were told we could decide life and death decisions for her, as next of kin, but we couldn’t see her records or give permission for her hair to be cut or apparently take photos of her.

Privacy Laws

Because of privacy laws today, we had to go in front of a judge to get legal authority to take care of our daughter and make decisions for her that she could no longer make. We already had the stress of our daughter laying in a coma. Now we had to take care of legal matters that took us away from her. We did get judge ordered guardianship and conservatorship papers that meant we could take care of anything needed for Chivon. Even see any records we needed or felt necessary. At least, that was according to the judge and our attorney.

Well, rest assured when I tell you that wasn’t the end of the legal disagreements. We couldn’t do any of her banking for her or cancel her college money or even cancel classes for her. Not without a power of attorney. According to the judge, our attorney and even social workers, the court appointed guardianship was better than a power of attorney, but to the rest of the world—-not so much.

WHY SHARE THIS STORY

Now, why am I telling you this story? Because, you need to believe that when I say you really, truly need the following documents, it’s so that what happened to us, doesn’t happen to you and your family. It made an absolutely horrendous situation even worse. Whereas, I suspect if we had had the following documents already on hand, things may have gone a bit smoother.

So, let’s get on with the good stuff. When your teen turns 18 and I mean the very minute your teen turns 18, you have lost all your parental rights—boom, they’ve fallen deep down into a cavern, never to be seen again. You no longer have the right to know about their finances, education (yes, that means grades) and any medical affairs including just making them a doctor’s appointment. Basically, there are three Federal Acts to be concerned with when someone turns 18; FERPA, which means Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act, HIPAA and Selective Service.

Most of us know what HIPAA means because we have to sign a form about it almost every time we see a doctor, so I won’t go into that. This Act has to do with all things medical. Selective Service means that as soon as your son turns 18, he needs to register with this service. It’s a federal offense if he doesn’t, that could cost him up to 5 years in prison and a $250,000 fine. Right now, girls don’t have to register. Register here.

Now that I’ve let you know about a few things that may hit you right between the eyes when your kid turns 18, let me go on to the legal documents suggested. I have to do medical first because, of course that means the most to me.

MEDICAL

Medical Power of Attorney and a Durable Power of Attorney

Why two? It’s not overkill as one takes care of medical situations only, the other takes care of everything else. The medical POA will let you make medical decisions if your child becomes incapacitated, medically or physically, in any way. It comes into play only then and if your child can’t make decisions for themselves.

A durable POA should cover anything else that may come up like banking, housing or school.

medical reasons why need legal docs for 18 year oldss

HIPPA

This document is the one that would keep you, as parents of an 18 year old from knowing anything medical about them. It’s very important that he or she sign a HIPAA form that specifically states you have their permission. Medical personnel can only share medical information with the person stated on this release and no one else, so make sure both parent’s names are on the form.

Advanced Medical Directive

I know this is a legal form that none of us want to think about. Unfortunately, if we want to be able to take care of our loved ones the way they want, then this form needs to be taken care of. I’d rather know ahead of time how my kids or husband want to be taken care of rather than having to try and second guess them during a life-threatening situation.

ADDITIONAL DOCUMENTS NEEDED BEFORE COLLEGE

FERPA is a federal law that protects student privacy and their educational information, including their grades. Your child needs to sign the FERPA form so you have access to this information. Hint: don’t let them tell you they never received this form because the form is usually included in every student packet. Have them sign it before they leave for school. There are exceptions, like when the student’s health and safety come into play, BUT, the school is not required to even notify you.

I suggest having an attorney draw up the POA’s and medical directive. I realize that may be expensive, but these documents need to be created with your state laws in mind. The other alternative is going online to get the documents and hope they work for your state. Some online legal companies will let you talk to an attorney, so that is an option.

Turning 18 is a really big deal as far as our laws are concerned and can have many implications. At 18, your child is an adult, according to those laws. They can now vote, get married and even buy property–all without telling you. Your roll as parents most certainly changes also. Look at it as a good thing, because it means your child is growing up, which is part of life.

For many of us, it’s hard to let our kids go; I feel your pain–truly. But you both will get through it and getting these documents taken care of ahead of time will help make things somewhat easier.